Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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