so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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