its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize