summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I forgot how hot balto sounded
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
