yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
