I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
