there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
