Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
