So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
