Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize