I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
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