I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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