I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Randomize
