i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
