Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
