To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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