I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
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