Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
