If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
