did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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