do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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