i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
