im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
i believe in u and ur pee
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
