Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
