It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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