Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
