is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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