My brain says no but my pants say off.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
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