youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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