First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
She's the barista slut.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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