I wish my penis had an off switch
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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