i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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