Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
You pole danced in your parka.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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