hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
