he shaved USA in his pubs
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
