I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
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