Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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