can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
