the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
And then my night got REAL pukey
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Randomize
