oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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