yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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