As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Randomize
