Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
