I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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