he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
