Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize