I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
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