You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
