is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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