I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
